« Good afternoon my main man Lewis!

Today the purpose of this email is to inform you of something that happened recently in my life, after hearing Simon challenge my manly authority by saying that if I had the balls, to record myself, shaking up a soda can really well and having a friend record me.
Immediatly I rung up a few friends and said: "Hey, want to come over to my house and quickly help me with something?" Of course they rejected, since most of them do not like me, after I showed them your YoGPoD. Anyway, I thought: "Ok, well this will be terrible since I have no one to record me, and you will just think I'm a nutter."
But then I remembered, I have a sister. She's about 14 years-old, I am 17. I said: "Hey, come over here and record this for me, I need it for a science assignment." I guess since she was doing nothing she accepted, and held the camera for me.
So she starts recording me, and I say: "Hello. I am Dave! Yognaut, and I have the balls!" I immediatly toss the can at the wall in order for it to be a legit test.
Suddenly, the can starts shrieking. Me and my sister quickly look at eachother in shock. I begin to make my way towards the can to tap it, and I hear a loud banging noise from the can. I am scared. I am nervous. I am sweating. And my sister is laughing, while recording me watching this can screech and make loud banging noises.
I leap towards the can and grab hold of it. The can starts resisting my grasp. I hold on as tightly as I can, and annihilate the top of the can. I grab the little handle while the can shakes furiously and screeches at me. And without thinking I pull the handle.
The can explodes. Giant beams of Coca-Cola shoot all over my room. One surges towards my sister and blows a hole in her head, killing her instantly. My house begins to fall apart. I hear the loudest noise I've ever heard in my life. I slowly turn around to see a rip in the space-time continuum. It is sucking in everything it can: my neighbours, my pets, my house, my sister's corpse, my property, my street, my region, my city, my state, my country, and then it overloaded and exploded. All that was left was a small island, me and my computer and video camera. A single tear was running down my eye, as I thought about the things I would never do again, the people I would never see again. I then went on my computer and began this email.
In conclusion, no, tapping the top of a soda can will not stop it from exploding if it is shaken. It does not work, do not try it ever ok? Sincerely, a true Australian YoGPoD fan.



Nick Fuckface


P.S.: my sister didn't even record, what the fuck stupid bitch »